Obituary of Barbara Lee Munsell

Barbara Lee Munsell was born on January 12, 1945, in a cold, snowy Minneapolis, Minnesota, to George and Zerita Packard. Barbara slipped peacefully into eternity on a hot and humid afternoon in Tulsa, Oklahoma, surrounded by family at the age of 75 after a tremendously courageous thirty-five year battle with multiple cancers. Barbara was a beloved grandmother, mother, wife, and sister. She grew up in Tulsa and graduated from Nathan Hale High School in 1963. She attended the University of Tulsa and was a member of the Chi Omega sorority. She moved with her parents to Tahlequah, OK where her father served St. Basil’s Episcopal Church. She took classes and worked at Northeastern State College until she met a particularly fetching professor, Dr. Jay B. Munsell. The two married on March 30, 1969 at St. Basil’s. An article at the time reported, “Her veil of candlelight illusion was fastened to a peau de soie bow accented with seed pearls.” The couple had two children, Jason and Amy, and all lived in Tahlequah for many years; Jason and Amy were both graduates of Tahlequah High School and both Valedictorians. While her husband taught formally as a professor at NSU, Barbara was the family professor. She helped Jason and Amy with many subjects, but also valuable life lessons: “you can strongly disagree, but never hate” was a repeated piece of instruction. An avid reader of trashy romance novels, Barbara eventually worked for many years managing NSU’s bookstore. After both she and Jay retired, they moved to Tulsa, where Amy had started a family. Barbara was an amazingly generous person and found joy as a servant to others. She wanted to make other people feel safe, happy, and loved and provided many things to many people; food, money, clothes, a place to stay if needed. She was also a passionate defender of her family and friends; she might disagree with people on occasion, but would fully support them regardless. Oh, and she loved a sale. They knew her on first name basis at Utica Square’s, J. Jill. She loved to buy things for other people too; even as ridiculously priced as they are, one pair of Lululemon shorts was never enough. She also spoiled her beloved dogs throughout the years. A fan of Barry Manilow, Barbara’s dog Mandy will be well looked after. She loved going to Tulsa Shock games with family; she and Jay were season ticket holders. What is indeed perhaps shocking, she did not like to cook. Though she famously made “magic squares” and cheese balls for holidays and special occasions, she would rather eat food than prepare it. After her husband died four years ago, most of her home cooked meals were prepared by her daughter-in-law, Trina. She particularly loved Trina’s meatloaf and would tuck in for a good dinner at her daughter’s home several times a week in her last years. At home, she indulged in her love of sweets; a bad habit she passed down to Jaden. She had a particularly close relationship with her granddaughter, Jaden. Barbara and Jay helped raise Jaden and she stayed with them every day while Amy worked. As a grandmother, Barbara became known as “Anya,” a name bestowed on her by two year old Jaden. For the last several years of her life, Barbara was better known as Anya to all, and Jaden was her closest companion. She looked forward to picking Jaden up from school, and as Jaden grew, watching her dance on the pom team at middle school football and basketball games. And she spoiled Jaden rotten. Anya and Jaden shopped, ate, decorated and organized Anya’s house together. Anya and Jaden were two peas in a pod and in no small way Barbara’s legacy will live on through Jaden. Throughout much of this time, Barbara lived with cancer. She was diagnosed with her first breast cancer in 1985. She would go on to fight a second breast cancer, skin cancer, endometrial cancer, a third re-emergence of breast cancer, this time metastatic, five years ago, and, finally, a new metastatic urothelial cancer diagnosed just weeks ago that aggressively assaulted her body until, as she told her daughter on the day she died, she was “done.” She was an intuitive fighter as well as a reluctant hero. Barbara was preceded in death by her husband, parents, and a brother. She is survived by son, Jason B. Munsell (spouse Mindy Fenske) of West Columbia, SC; daughter Amy Munsell (spouse Trina Bolles) of Tulsa; grandchildren Jaden Bre Munsell, Madison Bolles, and Mason Bolles. She is also survived by her sister, Susan Packard Moffatt (spouse George) as well as by nephew Todd Connor, nieces Holly Munsell Becker and Mindy Munsell Bartlett, cousins, and other extended family members. The family offers sincere appreciation for the thoughts and prayers we have received during her illness and upon her death. We particularly appreciate the care she received over the past few weeks at St. Francis Hospital. During this Covid-19 pandemic and with the safety of others in mind, the family will hold a small private family service at St. Luke’s Episcopal Church in Tulsa, Tuesday, August 18th. In lieu of flowers, the family requests donations to support the American Cancer Society or any other cancer related charity.